God has been nudging me for months. Months. “She needs to hear your story.” It was like a loud whisper to my heart, but in my stubbornness I argued, “I don’t have time to write all this down. Nobody wants to read this. My kids need me and I don’t have time to write.” He whispered loudly “She needs to hear your story.” I argued back “WHO is SHE?! Who are you talking about?!” And he nudged me forward with the same whisper “Does it matter who she is? She NEEDS to hear your story.”
I think I’ve finally given up. Part of me anyway. It’s time to surrender and start putting it all on paper, I mean a blog. One, I don’t want to forget what God did for us and two, he told me “she” needed to read it. Hi, She! Welcome to my blog. I’m glad your here because I am writing just for you! 😀
I’m sure tomorrow I will start arguing again with God about this whole blog thing but today I’ve chosen to walk forward in what I feel he is asking me to do. Getting the last two years down on paper feels like water to me, ya know trying to walk towards Jesus on water. So with each post I’m gonna step out of my boat and put my feet on water. My eyes can’t be on my readers, who’s listening, who’s not, but I must fix them on my Jesus so that I can walk. It his job to nudge “she’s” heart. Phew , pressure’s off. I can rest knowing what God has called me to, he will walk me through.
So, here I am trying to take my thoughts, feelings, and heart back to May 14, 2014. I think the story started long before that, maybe when Ronnie chose a degree in physical education just so he could coach, maybe it started on March 2, 2004 when I met Ronnie on a baseball field in Surry county. Yes we shook hands for the first time on a baseball field!! What young man shakes the hand of a girl he has special interest in?! Well Ronnie Pruitt does. Awkward as it seemed, some part of that handshake was endearing to me!! Ha! Ok I am off track, but however this story started, May 14 was a day very significant for both of us and it was just a few nights before that I watched him coach his last home game. I wrote a post with a little piece of that night here .
On May 14 Ronnie had taken his team to the first round of the state playoffs. It was his last game as the head baseball coach at Ashe county high school. It was to far for me to take the kids, you know you might as well plan a road trip to go to some of these schools out in the country. Three kids, no bathroom for miles, protecting small heads from flying balls, and “he touched me” all the way home just didn’t seem possible for me to tackle alone on a random school night. I wrote a Facebook post that day praying over my hubby and those boys because writing and praying felt like the only thing I knew to do. Facebook post May 14 2014
After I got the kids to bed that night I waited up for the end of the game, a call from my hubby, and the anticipation of the weeks ahead. Soon the team would know. And anxiety built as I wondered how my hubby would handle leaving a decade of coaching behind. My heart knew the dedication he had for coaching, his team, his kids, and even the pride he took in a clean team bus and a freshly cut field of green baseball grass. As his wife I knew the hours he spent mowing and trimming the field. I even remember the summer I helped him repaint the baseball dugouts. Only committed wives do that PRUITT!! You owe me! 😉 There were many nights he came home and when I asked what took so long he would say “Well I had to put up equipment, put the uniforms in the wash, and sweep the bus.” Yes he washed team uniforms, in fact to be on the team you had to bring a bottle of Shout to the first day of practice!! He’s a CLEAN baseball coach. Rare find I know. Sorry he’s taken!! :p This coach didn’t just pick up the trash, he swept the bus. He didn’t just mow the field, he trimmed around dug outs, baseball fence, and bleachers. He didn’t just order white baseball pants, he washed their uniforms. And he didn’t just coach, he invested. He loved those players fiercely. Each summer when he received his check for coaching I was reminded of why he coached. The hours invested and the financial return could not compare. His why. His why was his team. He loved the game and he loved his players. No wonder my heart was heavy.
After the game ended a mom of a player began to send me pictures.
My husband under a whole pile of his players. A teenage boy’s way of saying “I love you man.” And then a circle of players and a student leading prayer. My heart ached. Literally.
“God, what are you doing?” I asked.
“Why are you taking coaching from him?”
“What does this mean for our family?”
Questions took over my heart. My mind raced. And I knew that I had to stand on promises. Promises from the one who gives and the one who takes away. Scripture came to mind. I hid a few verses in my heart and I prayed. My faith was small, a seed small, a mustard seed small. But a little seed in me believed God had a bigger plan. A story of redemption. God wasn’t finished with my husband yet.
Isaiah 43:19 came to mind:
“See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness. And streams in the wasteland.”
A life without coaching for Ronnie was a wasteland, a wilderness. But God was promising me he would bring water to that desert.
And then God whispered another promise to my heart. Phillipians 1:6
“For I am confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”
I could be confident!! God was not finished with my husband yet!
Funny thing is, God wasn’t finished with his wife either. Or his children. He had plans for all of us, beyond our imaginations or expectations. Over the next two years my faith as a follower of Christ, a wife, and a mother would grow beyond belief. But how did it happen? What happened? How did we end up a state away with a hope filled future?
Well, this is my story. God’s story in my life. Faith. Love. Redemption. Hope.
My prayer is that whatever God wants to say through my story, that he will get the glory. His glory is my priority. <3